Apr 27, 2010

-y X?..

i see him standing on top of his building front of his house
brownstone
he 'bout to be out
leave home to roam
gotta catch a plane
goin a far place from home
to entertain crowds that know his name
its a shame
the love he gettin
he gettin due to his fame
at home he's estranged
with his wife n couple a kids
aint that a bitch..
been workin for this for most of his life
now he feel he gotta choose
either way he feel he lose
decisions like this to him
feel like a noose
lonely dark nights
find him
singin the blues
see the crowd dont know this
but away from the lights
he sits under dark nights
tryina get his heart right
while he smoke and drink and think over his life
pray for some light
and pray to do right

he in thought lost
while he hear a knock on the door
he knows whats next in store
he did it all before

thoughts like this go thru his head
the kids the regrets
the life that they led
how great the sex when they made up when they was vexed
he jus thinkin bout
how he dont wanna be ex
and tears fill his eyes
when he realizes
what a break up could do
to their kids lives
he never meant for this
never meant the disses
never wanted his life to be filled
with only remenisces
damn
he know break ups
he know this the one
damn
he know he only gonna get to see
but so much of his son
will his son be raised by a new man?
damn

now he know he a good man
and he know
in her heart she know it too
why cant she understand?
what can he do?

here come his crew
out on the town
the weight of a man
all the way down
aint much else to do
he gotta get around
gotta do his thing
addicted to the sound..

still sit fuckin with him
like a million bee stings
tears on his cheex
everytime he sings
noone he talk to
can change the way he sees things
couldnt get his fam back
if he bought her three rings
love n laughter
turned to disaster
his world crumbling
now he knows he cant trust her no more
not like before
too much has happened
nothing left for him to do
but to keep writn' n rappin'
he know prefer that to the fightin'
thats the place he can lose his soul in
without his soul usin it against him
he knows their home is no longer a friend
the life he once knew
has come to an end
and he know he not perfect
yet he thinks
what kinda sin has he committed
for life to bring him
this kinda sadness..
tryina get past this
fallin asleep
on a single mattress..

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